Sunday, December 12, 2004

Get myself out

It is 10.50 a.m. and the sun has yet to chase away the rain. I am now listen to Rachmaninov's Second Piano Concerto. It is one of my favourite piano concertos, but I must have been too built up with frustrations that I could not appreciate its full value.

My head is giving me aches now and then since the day before yesterday. Certainly unpleasant.

It looks like, as it has many of the times been, this world has never been meant for me. I feel like getting myself out of this world to take a break, then hopefully I could reconnect. Even if such could be short-lived.

It is raining, and I am just healing from my infection, but I think I better get myself out of my flat. It may seem comfortable place to be in, away from the rain and cold, but I think if I would risk losing my sanity if I were to continue to seek comfort in a flat unit with only four walls. What seems to be comfort may often be an illusion. I shall not be deceived by the illusion. Even if I were to be on my own out in the rain and cold, I have the company of the trees, the skies, the rain clouds and rain drops.

Maybe the air outside the four walls would soothe me a little.

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