Perhaps it is because we have spent a reasonable amount of time practising on our instruments, and because we do our best to take good care of our instruments, I am aware of a number of my fellow orchestra members (and other music-instrument players) who often refer their instruments as their "spouse". It is, for me, a way to add a twist of humour to how I am rather attached to my instrument, especially during those times when I am preparing for a concert.
Sometimes, when I speak of my instrument in front of others, I would often refer the double bass as my "husband". I am proud to share that my "husband" is about 2 metres tall. He has a shapely figure, and a nice deep voice (though I would like him to be more resonating). He is a great listener, and he does not argue nor talk back. But it did bother me when his voice goes nasal because of too humid a weather. He is nice to hug, and generous with lending his shoulders in times of my need. He is quite nice to dance with, and I often enjoy the music he sings to me. If I had not given him my "company" for quite a while, he is understanding enough not to complain. I think if I were to go on, I would be guilty of over-personifying "him".
I am quite proud to announce as an instrument player that I am "married" to the double bass. I wonder if I could find anyone nicer who could replace its place in my heart? Probably not, certain things are hard to replace.
Talking about marriage, I have been receiving a few cases that are related to marital issues. This means that I get to see the couples to work with them on their marital concerns. For me, I don't do group work with several couples. I would usually see one couple at a time, and work with each couple on its marital concerns.
This brings me to also recall a seminar on family life that I had attended earlier. There were quite a number of discussions about marriage and how to sustain and enrich a marriage. It seems that marriage is quite a social institution in itself, I had gathered. At the same time, it is rather personal and unique to each couple. Somehow it seems that there are many challenges, at the same time, blessings in trying to keep a marriage going and alive.
For your information, I am not married (except to the double bass), so it does take a lot of humility and a drive to wish to learn to work with married couples on marital issues. So it is likely I would be discussing quite an amount with my supervisor so that I could be able to be more effective in working with the couples. And for an INFJ, reading up helps too. Please don't ask me more, I am not to divulge any information about my clients as these are strictly confidential.
In sheer jest, I should say, it might have been lucky for me that I am married to the double bass. I would probably not have to face the same kind of issues that married couples face. Then again, I am not sure if I am free from problems. I would probably have my own set of challenges to face with the double bass. For one thing, it can't move around unless someone carries it around! Anyway, it is hollow actually, so with skill and a bit more stamina on my part, that should not be too much of a problem.
For now, until there is a very eligible human husband to grow old with, I shall delight in the company of my dear double bass, so ever steady and solid.
2 comments:
dear pei yun, thank you for writing to me. hehe, my mail to you got "eaten up" again, as usual, because i am interrupted often in the course of my work.
it's also strange to realise that each time i get back to write something to you, my train of thought also changes a little, and so i "pen" something different instead. this also shows how "changeable" we are to exterior circumstances, ie. how couples and friends sometimes quarrel, at inopportune times. what i mean to say is, we say things we don't really mean at times, and our friends bear the brunt, and vice versa. if only people realise that, there would be more tolerance in this world.
ciao, gotta work, before this gets eaten up again, and i write entirely different again! ;)
Congratulations on your very successful association with your love, your double bass. I, too, have an affection for the effectuations of a double bass. Having been a lover and player of hillbilly music for some 65 years now, I recall with great fondness the unique rumbling voice of the double bass. Alas, it has now mostly gone the way of the hillbilly music of my youth and been replaced by electric and amplified solid boxes. But, at various musical jam sessions, I occassionally stumble across some old friend being being coaxed into performing for, what I am sure is, my personal benefit. That almost makes growing older worth while! Or at least a bit easier.
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