Is it the way of human's life to warn fellow folks against walking what may seem like difficult paths for oneself? Yet how a pity it might have been, if fellow folks had decided to follow the advice and find that those seemingly difficult paths were imagined? Then would that meant lost opportunities in walking the seemingly difficult paths that may perhaps make one live more alive?
I hope it is all imagined, that it was not safe to disclose one's dreams to another being. But when sometimes I did disclose, I was given advice unsolicitedly. Not blame the giver, for I knew all advice were meant with good intentions. But when one's heart is already weak and confidence failing, it takes one some bit of strength to cushion the unintended effects of unsolicited advice. Next is to muster the wisdom to process through the advice, take in what may apply, and have the courage to ignore those that don't.
When the intentions of disclosing were that of sharing one's worldviews, unnecessary advice does make one start to wonder if it were safe to disclose at all. For that I remember the values of respect and being non-judgemental. Then one realised, these are values that takes a lot of skill to conscientiously practise. So forgive others if they have failed to practise these values fully.
But when the risk of feeling demoralised from getting unsolicited advice exceeds that of sharing oneself to be understood, bear with one that disclosure may not be the chosen choice.
2 comments:
think we should expect unsolicited comments if we wanna share with others... and it's so true that albeit they are of good intentions, when one's heart is already weak and confidence failing, it just made things worse. I know tat kinda feeling.
Guess this is all part of learning and growing up. In mandarin, to be "dao(1) jiang(1) bu(2) ru(4)" ;)
take heart. sometimes humans express care in seemingly strange ways. like when a lost child is found, the mother beats up the kid though she was profoundly worried just moments before. we are not equipped with skills of communication. by saying that, i also do not mean it is safe to share with anyone one's needs, but there are good friends around, if you can spot them accurately.
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